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Joke of the Day

"I'm no mathlete, but I CAN tell you that a 6 y/o running at 8 mph chasing an ice cream truck moving at 10 mph flies 7.4 ft if you trip him."

"Best Bang for your Buck! would make a great punchline for a joke about bambi and the intricate workings of an illegal woodland critter prostitution service"

"parents just reaming ms frizzle out at a pta meeting. ""you took our kids to god damn outer space. we didnt even have to sign a form"""

"A dyslexic man walks into a bra..."

"WIFE: you can't just deep-fry everything ME: what do you mean? WIFE: I mean put down the cat"

"My therapist said I have acute personality disorder. I was like I know, right?"

"It's cute how my family thinks I'm playing with fire and I'm just trying to cook them breakfast"

"Here's my impression of an astronomer discovering that an asteroid is coming to destroy earth: ""This will make me famous but not for long"""

"Why are there no gay suicide bombers? They can find millions of virgins just by going on Reddit."

"Why is 6 scared of 7 Numbers are a conseptional idea thought by humans and as such they are not able to produce emotions and/or think."