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Joke of the Day

"If a blue man lives in the blue house and a red man lives in the red house, who lives in the white house? A white man."

"What do chemists make guacamole out of? Avogadros"

"Why doesn't anyone invite copyeditors to parties when we're such cool people out with whom to hang?"

"So many people want to hit me for my jokes, they have to stand in a punch line."

"Two men walk into a bar The third ducks. LOL"

"Whoever said you can't teach an old dog new tricks was so wrong. I taught mine how to play dead and she's been doing it for a year straight."

"Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use protection.. A fake name and a fake number."

"I've been having constant sleep paralysis In my last 3 dreams I was in a wheelchair"

"Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell? Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp."

"Opinions are like mixtapes... I don't want to hear yours."