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Joke of the Day

"Priest: Do you read to your kids from the Good Book? Me: Every night Priest: What's their favorite part? Me: When Frodo destroys the ring"

"Where can you find the best joke book in the world? The Seattle Seahawks play book. Edit: sorry for the typo."

"What does a redneck Buddhist believe in? Reintarnation."

"A guy walks into a bar and orders ten shots... Poor guy, he was filled with bullets in the end of the day."

"Jesus' Greatest Miracles: 3) Turning water to wine 2) Raising Lazarus 1) Maintaining a milky-white complexion in a desert climate for 33 yrs"

"People who speak who speak 3 languages are trilingual People who speak 2 languages are bilingual. People who speak 1 language are Americans."

"Just when I think I'm 100% against the death penalty, I see a bright yellow hummer taking up two parking spots."

"Why did the baker have brown hands? He kneaded a poo."

"Working on a new type of martial arts that involves taking money from Hispanics.. called TakeJuan'sDough."

"I hate it when winter comes. It makes my wenis so dry."