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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Libertarian cross the road? ""None of your damn business. Am I being detained?"""

"What do you call Muhammad Ali after he eats lots of beans? Gaseous Clay"

"The last US election had a candidate called Mitt, a devout Catholic and a candidate called Newt, a serial adulterer. One was against same sex marriage and the other was against same marriage sex."

"Here's a fact, gay guys love vagina. Okay, that might be wrong. I'm just trying to get my facts straight."

"I don't like camels And anybody who can go a week without a drink."

"I fell asleep & my cat ate the crackers I left on the table. To teach him a lesson, I ate all his Friskies while he's sleeping on the couch."

"Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? (punchline in comments)"

"How do you get a fat girl into bed? It's a piece of cake"

"A tried to take a photo of the fog last night. I mist."

"*slams table WHY DID VILLAINS FROM SCOOBY-DOO ASSUME THEY'D GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING IF NOT FOR MEDDLING KIDS THEY GOT CAUGHT BY A STONED DOG"