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Joke of the Day

"I just want to be rich enough where I snap my fingers and 7 people fight over who gets to make me my next grilled cheese."

"Someone should make a joke about music... I've never seen it done on a major scale."

"I can't stop telling people how modest I am."

"I got lost.. Walking around your fat mother"

"What's 6"" long, bent to the left, and in the front of my pants?? My iPhone 6."

"What do you call a robbery in China ? A Chinese take away !"

"The difference between me and Bill Gates is ""th"". He makes tens of millions of dollars per year. I make tenths of millions of dollars per year."

"Procrastinators unite! tomorrow"

"My wife is like a grape She lets out a little whine."

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? can't jam peanut butter in your ass"