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Joke of the Day

"A man has been found guilty of overusing commas The judge warned him to expect a very long sentence."

"A man walks into a bar and yells, ""All Lawyers are assholes!"" Someone at the bar stands up and says, ""I take offense to that."" ""Why? Are you a lawyer?"" ""No. I'm an asshole."""

"So this is weird: I bent over to pick up a cashew & a bunch of hot, scented air rushed out of my bottome-hole, making a curious noise."

"Q. How do men define a ""50/50"" relationship? A. We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle."

"What's worse than fighting an uphill battle? Getting to the top and realizing it's all downhill from there."

"Woke up with a hangover to the sound of my neighbor cutting the grass. He can cut around me, I'm not movin'."

"I organized an orgasm denial convention. Nobody came."

"What is a Mexicans closing sales pitch? Kay-so-deal-a?"

"A parachutist died I didn't know him but his friend said he was a real ' down to earth' guy"

"What did one gay sperm say to the other??? Wanna get shit faced?!"