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Joke of the Day

"I know it wouldn't be ""environmentally friendly"" but I wish someone would invent disposable handkerchiefs."

"Sadly learned my family is racist. I started dating a black girl. Brought her home to meet the family. Wife and kids wouldn't talk to her."

"[at wine tasting] Hmm yes, very good. a slight smokey undertone. ""Sir, you just put your cigarette in your wine"" Strong smokey undertone"

"The Fine Bros. 'React' announcement was like a television with no antenna. Poor reception."

"You ever hear about the guy who goosed the ghost? He got a handful of sheet."

"Someone -- always a man -- always asks ""does the ship run on generators?"" The Cruise Director usually tells them ""No we just have a very long power line running to the mainland."""

"Lunch Me and the girlfriend went out for lunch today. Money is a bit tight so after the meal she said ""lets go Dutch"". I said ""Fook that lets go Greek"" and we both legged it"

"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because the neckbeard put on the wrong pair of socks this morning."

"Things never heard before sex, ""Wait let me take off my crocs first"""

"I like to leave my gas cap hanging off when I'm on a date so when people start honking and waving I can wave back like I'm famous"