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Joke of the Day

"It's not working out because we like different things. For example, I like quiet evenings at home, and she likes someone else."

"Did you hear about the blind engineer ? Who built the taj mahal"

"How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb. Two. One to hold the light bulb and the other to hold the penis. I mean mother. Shit, I mean ladder."

"If a tiger goes to bite you, confuse him by french kissing him. You'll probably still die, but at least you got to make out w/ a tiger."

"League of Legends Solo Queue"

"What is dry on the outside filled with water and blows up buildings ? A fish tank !"

"Jaws (2015): ""(cell phone) Hi Coast Guard, yeah a shark is banging my boat oh you're on your way great thanks"""

"There are 30 cows and twenty eight chickens... How many didn't? Better told in person."

"What's a pirate's favourite letter? A P. Because it's like an ARR, but it's missing a leg."

"If only Steve Irwin wore sun screen. He could have been protected from harmful rays."