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Joke of the Day
"______________________ I'm drawing a blank here."
Next Joke
"[god, creating ducks] Just like put a surfboard mouth on a big pigeon and make it like a loud idiot. I don't know"
"Bored? Find group photo of 4 women on Instagram. Comment ""You 3 look incredible!!"""
"Why do Asian woman have small breasts? Because her parents accept nothing less than an A."
"No, those pants don't make you look fatter. I mean, how could they?"
"I ate an optimist once.. but I couldn't keep him down!"
"[someone kicks a dumpster out of anger] ME (from inside): Who is it?"
"So I was listening to classical music really loudly the other day when suddenly... My speakers Baroque."
"How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? One will see you later and one will see you in a while."
"Wife: Where did all this glitter come from? Me: Jake, at State Farm."