190109

Joke of the Day

"Who should you pray to if you don't want the airplane that you are on to get diverted? Diversion Mary"

"Now tell me how old your baby is in HOURS."

"Women and not finding me attractive. If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive."

"Never trust an atom. Actually, it's probably fine. They only make up about 4% of everything."

"I slept on the sofa last night which is weird because I'm not even married."

"I wanted to be a tailor. But I didn't suit the job."

"How Dave Grohl spent his night in his hotel room after the concert in Gothenburg, Sweden? He watched movie Cast Away (starring Tom Hanks) and ate some potato chips."

"Why do Cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose."

"Apparently the yellow power ranger died after being hit by a car. ""It's MORPHINE time"" joked one ER nurse, who was later fired."

"What do you call it when a bunch of deer have an intervention for one of their friends? Change for a buck."