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Joke of the Day
"Doctor said only clear liquids before surgery. Vodka should qualify just fine."
Next Joke
"Living in Switzerland wouldn't be so bad. The flag is a plus."
"Republicans and elections The republicans wanted to have Jesus run for president. The plan had to be aborted though: he had a hole in his hand."
"What did Sonic the Hedgehog say 24 hours before he got a blood test? Gotta go fast."
"What can you use to fill your butt crack? Ass-fault"
"So I saw one of those ""Drink for Pink"" labels on a bottle of juice... Sounds like Georgia Tech's hookup strategy."
"What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones."
"Your wife and your lawyer are both drowning. You've got a choice to make. Do you go to lunch or a movie ?"
"Telling my friends that I prefer twitter over facebook is like when a white girl brought a black guy home for dinner in the '60s"
"I wish my wife was one of those government agents who aren't allowed to talk about what they did at work all day."