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Joke of the Day

"When someone loves you a lot they will buy you a burrito even when you're not hungry so you can get fat and no one else will love you."

"My brother can dish it out, but he can't take it. He since lost his job as a waiter."

"A skelington walks into a bar orders a beer and a mop"

"Did you hear about the blonde that tried to enter a weightlifting competition? The judges said ""Sorry, we've got enough dumbbells"""

"It's hard to get a lot done when you're busy having a snack every 15 minutes"

"What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family"

"Excuse me ma'am could you tell me the date? Because you're a total 10/10!"

"A mobster killed an Irishman with a porcelain doll He was accused of knick-knack paddy whack"

"*comes back with wife's purse* w: I said don't run or people will think you stole it! How many times did you get tackled? m:[bleeding] Twice"

"Minimize vs Close in 2014 In 2080: there were some dumb computer users who thought if they click on 'x' in Skype it will close it."