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Joke of the Day

"The Job Interview: HR: So you are bilingual? Me: Si HR: In your native tongue please. Me: Ooga Booga"

"Please make sure my tombstone reads: wish you were here."

"Do you know what the best part of wearing a watch is? Time is on your side."

"I texted my girlfriend ""I love you"" and she texted back ""I love you more. When I went to respond I made a typo and sent ""I love you moist""....I figured why correct it, it's true too."

"Wrong spellers.. Untie!!"

"I'm sorry I threw up all over your carpet when you referred to your spouse as your ""lover""."

"VOTERS: we want to give a boat a ridiculous name UK: no VOTERS: we want to break up the EU and trash the world economy UK: fine"

"Doctors have discovered a new strain of ebola in Israel They have appropriately named it Heebola."

"What is the most recycled joke that keeps getting used? Your mom."

"What has 3 balls and flies through space E.T the Extra Testicle I know this was awful I'm sorry"