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Joke of the Day
"John need Taxi John: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi. Steve: Yes, sir. You are a taxi"
Next Joke
"I only watch ""Game of Thrones"" because I'm trying catch a background extra wearing a wristwatch."
"How do astronauts plan a party? They planet. (Plan-et)"
"Wife comes back from the doctor and says to her husband: - Honey, I have a sad news - a gynecologist told me not have sex for a three weeks... Husband: And what did the dentist say?"
"I used to date a girl with eczema She had cracking tits"
"I got fired from my job at the sperm bank. I guess you can't keep saying ""Get a load of this guy"" every time someone walks in."
"Alcohol may not be able to give you a loving hug when you need it but the Liquor Mart employee's you're buying it off of sure can."
"According to Carl Jung, I should live life like a kleptomaniac hooker... ...and take things as they come."
"Who's this moderation person everyone tells me to drink with?"
"Whats the V in DVD stand for? Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today .. be kind)"