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Joke of the Day

"How many students does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to hold the light bulb and one to drink until the room spins."

"Simba - ""welcome to... The bone zone"" Nala - ""the what?"" Simba - ""elephant graveyard. I said elephant graveyard"""

"Who is the coolest guy at the hospital? The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick? The hip replacement guy."

"Where did the universe attend college? At the university."

"What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister? One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush.."

"What do you get when you cross a Classical German composer with an erupting volcano? Baklava. (It came to me in a dream last night. I dunno man..)"

"Anyone who thinks Jesus wasn't a white man has never been to communion The body of Christ is a cracker."

"Why do french tanks have rear view mirrors? To see the battle."

"What do you get when you cross reggaeton and masturbation? Dame mas Vasolina"

"No rule against wearing an old Halloween costume to Thanksgiving. Let your racist uncle talk presidential politics with Donkey from Shrek."