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Joke of the Day

"Do you know how NASCAR got its name? It's from North Carolina. There were a bunch of dudes standing around a car, and one of them said, ""That's a nas' car."""

"Take me down to the console city Where the games are blurry and the frames are thirty."

"I made a promise to a dying friend... ...that I'd stop making commitments."

"What do vegetarian dogs eat? Bark!"

"Toddler in our bed last night; it was like sleeping with an octopus on meth."

"What's the difference between a suicide vest and a feminist? The vest actually does something when it's triggered."

"The parachute making business must be great! Because nobody ever comes back to complain about a failed chute!"

"What's brownish and runs on oil? Jesus in a hurry."

"Happiness is like peeing in your pants ...everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth."

"are u nervous? do u hav nerves? dont wory. just take a deep breath. BUT NOT TOO DEEP!!! dont want ur lungs to pop. dont want that to hapen"