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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Balanchine ! Balachine who ? Balachine act !"

"Did you hear about the woman who only had two chances to get pregnant? She blew them both."

"I've found that I can usually judge how hot a woman is by how many times my girlfriend calls her a whore."

"To all you single ladies out there, as winter slowly approaches I am offering you a good high quality man blanket for this winter. Claim me now while supplies last. . ."

"I did some Star War's fantasy roll playing this weekend Me, Hand Solo and Princess Didn't-Get-Laid-a."

"If I were a superhero, I'd be Pizza Man. My one-liners would be cheesy, and I'd save you in 30 min or less, or your next criminal is free."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock Knock *Who's there?* The chicken!"

"How many times should you try starting your snowblower before you realize it's not going to start? According to my neighbor it's 458 times."

"I think I will start calling my wife ""My Customer"" since she is always right..."

"You can call me xenophobic... But I think the United Nations has too many foreigners."