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Joke of the Day
"I was a professional boxer. Then I picked up Muay Thai just for kicks."
Next Joke
"i don't think women should stay in the kitchen... i mean, how are they supposed to clean the rest of the house from there?"
"Him: your so funny, smart & beautiful how are you still single Me: *you're"
"If it's so good why can't I find a single car wash that carries the Brazilian wax thingy you guys keep tweeting about?"
"Our baby now can clap which I believe qualifies him to be a member of an infomercial audience."
"I'm exactly like Rocky in that, I challenge people to fight while I'm slurring my words."
"I do shrugs at the gym with like 400 pounds just to show everyone how hard I don't care."
"How I Crossed the Desert by Rhoda Camul"
"Just had a really enlightening yoga session! LOLJK! I'm drinking warm whiskey out of a water bottle designed for hamsters."
"I'll sleep when my iPhone's dead."