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Joke of the Day

"The American people should elect Gabe Newell president in 2020. That way we can be 100% certain the President of the United States will not start World War III."

"No YouP0rn... I do not want to play poker, I'm at work for crying out loud."

"Superwife! Gets pissed faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than your longest friendships. Leaps your decisions in a single bound."

"Why is the day that you do laundry, cook, clean, iron and so on, called a day off?"

"So we're on for next Friday? Perfect. I'll call you Thursday to reschedule."

"What cologne do engineers wear? Elon's musk"

"How does constipation work? I don't give a shit."

"So a deaf girl hit on me today... It was a sign"

"McDonalds employees get so cranky when you perform the entire dance routine to Britney Spear's ""I'm a slave for you"" before ordering."

"Why did the redditor cross the subreddit? To recycle a joke from the other side."