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Joke of the Day

"If the Jews are God's chosen people, then why did God bother creating gentiles? Well, someone has to pay retail."

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"My thoughts today are like underwear, I don't have any clean ones."
"""I saw a really nice chair yesterday."" - if your grandma tweeted"
"What's the best way to become a Russian leader? Stop Stalin! Just Putin the effort and start Lenin it happen!"
"A Zen master once said to me, Do the opposite of whatever I tell you.' So I didn't"
"In what direction do five gay guys walk?"
"What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? A chocolate ba-a-a-a"
"Why are quantum physicists so bad at sex? Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position."
"I don't have any good science related jokes to tell Because most of the good jokes argon"
"What kind of peanuts get warts? Planters."
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