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Joke of the Day

"Why does Elmer Fudd only let Bug's Bunny eat snickers bars? Because silly wabbit, twix are for kids!"

"What do you call an actor who has given up civilized life and gone to live in the wilderness? Will Feral. Edit: I tried"

"So you could say USA nuked Japan in the woman's world cup. Too soon?"

"You know what the difference is between an chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I wouldn't pay $100 to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"My girlfriend said we can have sex on days that start wit ""T""... ...Tomorrow."

"Lost: bucket of sand, silt, and gravel Great sedimental value. (I can't take credit. Read it in a university paper 20 years ago.)"

"What's the best thing about a woman? She doesn't have a dick! I'm so, so sorry."

"Here's a good one my dad told me.. A sober Irishman walks out of a bar.."

"Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar... OMg!"

"Someone just threw a bottle of Omega 3 tablets at me! I only received super fish oil injuries, but still..."