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Joke of the Day

"264 students died in a school fire... in Beijing earlier today. The most tragic thing was they all got out safely, ran around the building, and then ran back inside."

"What lives on a farm and says moo? a bilingual chicken"

"What do you call a whore's laughter? Ho hos"

"wife: How was work? [flashback to me being asked to leave the meeting because I couldn't stop giggling after someone said ""abreast""] me:Good"

"Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work"

"Do you think Apple's next phone will be a 6S?"

"If these grapes were drugs I'd be overdosing like a child star of the 80s."

"I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner, all it was doing was gathering dust."

"I need a career involving less interaction and more pizza. I've narrowed it down to: Pizza Farmer Pizza Hunter Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle"

"Why Donald Trump might win the election but resign on the first day? He finds out he has to move in to a small house in a black neighborhood!"