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Joke of the Day

"My body is well-defined. If you look under the word ""flabby""."

"I hate to toot my own horn, but: [sad trombone]."

"What is the difference between a prostitute with diarrhea and an epileptic corn husker? One shucks between fits.."

"Today marks 5 yrs of being smoke free!! Now I spend my time finding new places to hide the bodies of those who've pissed me off!"

"What the difference between an IS training camp and a primary school? There aren't many paedos in the camp."

"imagine explaining a magazine to a teen today ""yeah it's four bucks, there's like 900 words on 32 pages, and you'll get another next month"""

"1st girl @ the moon: - Houston, we have a problem - What happened? - Nothing, doesn't matter - Come on - Nothing.. - Tell me - U should know"

"Why do artists never win when they play football ? They keep drawing !"

"Why do irish fried beans only have 239 beans? Because the extra bean would be too farty."

"""Is your refrigerator running?"" ""Yes"" "" AWESOME! REFRIDGERATOR 2016!"""