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Joke of the Day

"Why do midgets laugh when they run in fields? Because the grass tickles their balls"

"I'm really good in bed. When you compare it to how fucking awful I am out of it."

"It's OK to pet him. Buffalo are gentle creatures."

"Favorite song What's a chinese chef's favorite song? I believe I can fry."

"What do you call the hot tub that two folks just made love in? H2OOOHHHGG"

"I ate a bad vegetarian kebab for lunch. Now I falafel."

"God never gives you more than you can handle. But I'm not God. I'm just a bag boy. And you'll wanna take these groceries out in the cart."

"Self Respect is... Washing your hands before you take a piss. ...or rather, leave one."

"Playing hide and seek in my office building because they can't fire you if they can't find you."

"What do lawyers wear to court? Law suits."