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Joke of the Day

"Science, Philosophy and Religion What is Science? Looking for a black cat in a black room. What is Philosophy? Asking whether there is a black cat in a black room. What is Religion? ""I HAVE THE CAT"""

"Even though my dad is a Trump supporter I let him borrow my car because I'm a good person. I mean, I'm going to report it stolen, but still."

"The worst thing about Hillary Clinton is she can't dicks out for Harambe even if she wanted to. Even Michelle can do that."

"How many blonde jokes exist? One. This one. The rest are all true."

"How do you make a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the oven at ~~three fifty~~ tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers. Edit:summoning happened."

"Q: Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? A: Works pretty well, doesn't it?"

"Jesus, take the wheel. Carlos, you take the stereo & I'll take lookout."

"What does a sperm and a politician have in common? They both have a one in 100 million chance of being human."

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? *gags*"

"What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister? One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush.."