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Joke of the Day
"Person: you only live once Me: that is the best news I've heard all day"
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a 10 year old and a stripper? .... you better fuqing know you sick fuck!"
"Not to interrupt your story, but do you have a completely different and possibly shorter story?"
"My favorite thing to say to old people is, ""When I was your age I didn't believe in reincarnation either""."
"the best thing about hair glitter is that you don't have to use it"
"What do a walrus and a zip-lock bag have in common? They're both looking for a tight seal."
"Two satellite antennas decided to get married The wedding was ok. But the reception was amazing!"
"Commas can change the meaning of a sentence. Example: I like to eat apples. ---> I like to eat commas."
"What is the Hamburglar's favorite David Bowie song? Rebel Rebel!"
"I'm so chuffed with myself! I just completed a puzzle in 40 minutes The box said 3-4 years"