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Joke of the Day

"""Harry Potter"" branded condoms. ""Protect your wand from Hogwarts while you're Slytherin in her chamber of secrets""."

"A jumper cable walks into a bar... The bartender looks at him and says: ""I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"""

"How to get a millionaire husband marry a billionaire man, then proceed to divorce him."

"I asked my friend if he ever went skiing. . . ""Not in real life, only in Florida."" "

"I have a bad habit of screaming during rectal exams. It really makes my patients nervous."

"A jewish girl asks her dad for 40 dollars her dad looks at her and says""30 DOLLARS??!!?!, what do you need 20 dollars for? here's a ten, go split it with your brother"""

"I was at a antique store and came across the first Playboy magazine ever issued...... Luckily, the owner didn't see me."

"How do you catch a unique bird? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame bird? Tame way you caught the unique bird."

"The difference between snowmen and snowwomen. Snowballs."

"What do you call a gay dinosaur ? Mega-saur-ass"