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Joke of the Day

"One of the great pleasures of living in a city is walking by a pile of bloody clothes and thinking, ""Someone else will take care of this."""

"I meet James Bond at my university. After some greetings, I ask him: ""Whats your GPA?"" James answers: ""4 2.4."""

"A cat got run over A little boy told his teacher that his cat got run over its ass and the teacher said its thats terrible but its called a rectum. the boy said: rectum? it near killed him."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I have a cape to wear and whoosh noises to make."

"Whats the only fruit that can't run away to get married?? A Cantaloupe."

"I'm not allowed to use the credit card anymore, last month I bought 43 falcons"

"History teacher: Which period did Cleopatra come from? Me: The one her mother missed?"

"Now why do sumo wrestlers shave their armpits? To avoid being mistaken for feminists."

"As a Malaysian, I thought that our Prime Minister would be crowned the worst political leader of the century But it looks like America has finally decided to us their Trump card."

"How did the Mathematician relieve his constipation? He worked it out with a pencil!"