174624

Joke of the Day

"Why aren't there any Muslim feminists? Pork is haram"

"One-liners for when you're leaving - example: ""I'm going to make like a baby, and head out."" I also use ""Let's make like a chapped-ass, and split."" What are some other good ones?"

"Dad: i don't know why you wear a bra-you've got nothing to put in it. MUM: you wear pants don't you?"

"Odo walks down the alley and turns into a bar."

"My son was twice as hungry as me. So I only ate a one Na fish sandwich."

"What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer? Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'"

"I'm the kind of crazy you weren't warned about because no one knew this level existed."

"10 qualities of a perfect girlfriend: 1. Truthful 2. Intelligent 3. Gentle 4. Humble 5. Tolerant 6. Polite 7. Understanding 8. Sexy 9. Smart 10. Young In short:- T.I.G.H.T.P.U.S.S.Y"

"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say to his wife when she asked if Christmas was his favourite holiday I still love Easter, Baby."

"My neighbor just walked by carrying some pots for planting & I said ""Looks like you won the pottery lottery!"" Now everyone is mad at me."