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Joke of the Day
"If you're already in the cop car, I really can't see how puking in it could make things any worse."
Next Joke
"The Amish girl was excommunicated... ...too Mennonite."
"I'm worried that I'm gonna get a super judgey coroner."
"How are Roman Polanski and pimples similar? Both cum on your face when you're 13. How are Roman Polanski and body hair similar? Both cum on your ass when you're 13."
"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Because my tires look like donuts? Cop: Get out"
"2 fish are in a tank The one asks, ""how do you shoot this?"""
"I told my parents to put their Euros in my UK bank account, just in case. It didn't work."
"Apparently, you can only say ""look at you! You got so big!"" to children,,, old girlfriends tend to get offended."
"If women lactate... Then men..."
"The projected sales figur- *phone buzzes* the proj- *buzzes again* *checks phone* Excuse me for a moment gentelmen I'm being owned online"