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Joke of the Day

"When I go to someone's house & they tell me to make myself at home, the first thing I do is throw them out because I don't like visitors."

"...we came in"" Roger Waters favourite line is ""Is this where..."

"What appears when you ask a genie for a classical composer? A wish Liszt."

"I lose a lot of arguments just so I can go back to my nap."

"The bible says ""Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you"" But I think that's sexual harassment."

"Bloody Fords! How is a voiceless crow like a Ford dealer? They both have broken kaa's."

"Never throw sunglasses in an argument. If they land perfectly on your opponent's face there is no known comeback."

"""You know what would make a good gift for this 3yr old? A harmonica."" - people without kids"

"What did one casket say to the other casket? ""Is that you coughin?"""

"St-t-t-t-top! Stamm-mm-m-m-mm-m-mer t-t-t-time!"