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Joke of the Day

"There are only 3 types of people that I hate. Racists, hypocrites and niggers."

"What did the head say to the butt? Better to be ahead than behind."

"I want a car horn that shouts obscenities."

"An average person has sex 300 times a year. The next 10 days are gonna be sick."

"Do you know why they can't make ice in Poland anymore? The lady that had the recipe died."

"No I don't have anything smaller than a twenty. You should. You're the one who's running a store."

"I heard this pitiful joke when I was a teen. Confucius say, woman who fly upside down have crack up."

"A soldier was assaulted with pepper spray and mustard gas. He returned home a seasoned veteran."

"Who is the wealthiest shellfish in the sea? [x-post from r/underwaterjokes] It's Prawnold Trump!"

"A man seeking to lose some of his excess weight visited the local doctor. John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat? Doctor: Of course! Cut your head off."