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Joke of the Day

"I would help you carry some of those bushes... but I've already got two palms on my hands."

"Note to self: before sending that e-mail... Don't ever rely again on the e-mail engine spell check. Latest letter of intent of mine went out with a 'T' instead of a 'G' in ""Best Regards"""

"Mexican drug lords now have ig and keep posting selfies with stacks of money, mansions and yachts. I think the army... could really learn something from that recruitment campaign."

"I get carried away sometimes... Usually because I refuse to leave."

"I lost a very dear friend and drinking buddy in a tragic accident this weekend. He got his finger caught in a wedding band."

"Why does SnoopDogg always carry an umbrella? Fo Drizzle"

"Did you hear about the scarecrow that got an award? It was for being outstanding in his field."

"What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator."

"What do you call it when a statistician secretly gives out clothes? Discreet uniform distribution"

"What did the Mexican guy get for Christmas? His verdict."