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Joke of the Day

"DC Comics to end production of Wonder Woman after DEA claims They stated the movie would have attracted to many people to a strong form of Heroine."

"You gotta hand it to short people. Because their arms can't reach."

"War: what is it good for? Resource acquisition, eliminating your enemies, blowing stuff up, feeling like a big man. So, lots actually."

"Q: What's a cat's favorite food? - A: Petatoes!"

"We don't need a Voting Rights Act. If we just give all the votes to rich people, then democracy will just trickle down to everyone else."

"The songs that make me feel coolest when I'm driving fast are generally the songs that make me feel dumbest at stop lights."

"So apparently Richard III will remain in that parking lot they found him in. Because nobody can afford to pay his ticket."

"I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with my back. I'm not sure yet, but I have a hunch."

"Why are assholes always more successful than you? Because they make shit happen."

"The New York Mets."