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Joke of the Day

"I am not an alcoholic. I simply enjoy living in liquid medium."

"Sometimes I stand in front of a Redbox until a long line gathers behind me.. Then I'll yell. Where's the fucking Pepsi button on this thing?"

"Why did Goku cross the road? Find out next time on Dragonball Z!"

"Did you hear about the double reed players having sex? They made one hell of a [rackett](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rackett)."

"An angel in heaven was welcoming a new arrival. ""How did you get here?"" he asked. And the new angel replied ""Flu..."""

"How did Trump describe his trip to the bathroom? It was a movement like the world has never seen before."

"How does someone stop ISIS? Change their name to past tense, WASWAS."

"TIL about Cunningham's law which states: The best way to get an answer online is to ask the question nicely."

"A termite walks into a bar... And says, ""is the bar tender here?"""

"Did you hear about the outbreak of Urinary Tract Infections at the University of Texas? It's odd they couldn't see the issue with all those UTI's"