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Joke of the Day

"Only one person cried when Chuck Norris was born and that was the doctor.... no one slaps Chuck Norris"

"Why is Florida not an island?? Because Georgia sucks..."

"I accidentally swallowed some Liquid Paper last night ...Today, I woke up with a massive correction."

"Losing weight to be attractive is weird. I see you shrunk your body slightly. Now I want you."

"Really not liking this new Reddit app update. I'm going to be sharing it all day."

"why put cookie dough in the oven when you can put it in your mouth"

"What do you get when The Dark Knight meets Edgar Allan Poe? (x-post from r/funny) [Poetic Justice](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me6ovqdnAp1rzkyaxo1_500.png)"

"Stuff I think about... I've often wondered what would happen if a Schizophrenic took a multi-vitamin. I have many more of these posers I may or may not post...."

"Chicks... ...they only get laid once."

"ME: woud u be open to adoption? HUSBAND: yes [later, at the adoption agency] ME: yes hi, i'd like to put my husband up for adoption"