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Joke of the Day

"I don't trust this 'would you like cash back' bullshit. I'm trying to give you my money, but you're also trying to give me my money? Weird."

"There are two types of people in this world. Those who finish what they start"

"My wife recently started snoring, so I decided to use earplugs. but I can only get one in before she wakes up, turns out she doesn't like it when I shove earplugs in her nose."

"What do you call an Indian man who fought for years for peace that then transitioned into a woman? Mahatma Gone-D"

"With the money I found in the dryer, the girl in me says buy chocolate and candy, but the adult in me says buy beer, chocolate and candy."

"How do you think the unthinkable? with an itheberg."

"What do you call a disabled paedophile? A creepy crawly"

"A man walks into a bar... ... He ended up with three stiches on his nose."

"Hey, Baby, you work for the TSA? 'Cause I've got a suspicious package, and I need you to blow it."

"A boy walks in on his two parents having sex. He walks out of a threesome."