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Joke of the Day
"I heard there's a woman going about with twelve nipples. Sounds absurd. Dozen tit."
Next Joke
"Finding a girlfriend is like finding a parking lot, Only the handicapped ones are left."
"A hug is basically a mini hostage situation."
"So, I asked my grandfather why he doesn't have a life insurance His answer? ""Because I want you to be truly sad when I'm gone"" :("
"I lent a hot girl my umbrella yesterday. That takes the number of girls I've made wet this year to -1."
"After reading that Afghanistan had the highest infant mortality rate, this occurred to me. What do you call Afghan triplets? Twins! I am so sorry...."
"How do you drown a hipster? ... you push him into the mainsteam"
"I just changed a light bulb with a beer in my hand if anyone needs a man for something."
"Start reading to your kids as early as possible. I start around 2:30 a.m."
"Why couldn't the melons run away and get married? They cantelope."