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Joke of the Day

"Q. Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible? A. Moses. Because he broke all 10 commandments; at once."

"Just apologized to my dog for being a crazy person, and I could tell by the way she didn't respond that she's been thinking it for a while."

"A white guy, a black guy and a priest walk into a bar.. I immediately shoot the fucking nigger in his head, taking another dark coon out of the gene pool."

"My girlfriend likes to play this weird game.. Where she dresses up like herself and acts like a bitch all the time."

"How do you get 100 babies into a bucket... With a blender How do you get them out again? With tortilla chips"

"What do you call an orphan named Rose? Self-raising flour"

"If threesome is sex with three people...... .....and a twosome sex with two people, I guess I know why I'm always called handsome. (Btw, is this a repost? I hope to god not.)"

"How do depressed people play the violin? With a razor and their wrist."

"What do you call iron man and silver surfer when they work together? Alloys."

"A 75 year old rich man marries a 20-yo beautiful woman... And a friend of his comes to ask how did he manage to pull that off. ""I told her I was 90""."