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Joke of the Day

"""Daddy,"" a little girl asked her father, ""do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'? "" ""No, sweetheart,"" he answered. ""Some begin with 'If I am elected.'"""

"Did you hear about the Parisian who jumped off a bridge? He went in Seine."

"Whats the difference between an onion and a hooker? *Dead pan face*, I don't cry when I cut up hookers."

"A friend of mine recently asked me what ballerina's wear... But I just couldn't put tu and tu together."

"What do Anne Frank and Bin Laden have in common? They're both hide and seek champions!"

"The other day someone said my clothes looked gay... I told them they got out of the closet just this morning."

"Why did the Native American feel so reluctant about booking a hotel room? He had his reservations."

"It's a good thing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles wore masks, or people might have recognized the 4 giant turtles at their day jobs."

"Where did Josef Stalin watch pornography? On Redtube."

"Girl Monster 1: ""I hear you've met the perfect guy."" Girl Monster 2: ""Oh yes he's a bad dream come true!"""