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Joke of the Day

"So I was Complaining about 1st world problems the other day When I realized that my complaining is a first world problem"

"It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a cockroach move out. ""Good luck,"" he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases."

"Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer? A: The joystick is wet."

"""wat can i say.. im a people person"" said the man who was MADE OUT OF PEOPLE"

"Wife smelled eggs and thought I was bringing her breakfast in bed. How do I tell her it was just me with gas?!"

"Why did the funeral director cover his mouth? he kept coffin"

"What do you call a women that catches fish? Annette"

"I got 99 problems... 100 of them are related to my inability to count."

"Have you heard about Michigan's music scene?? I hear there's a lot of heavy metal in Flint. :^)"

"I feel sorry for the people who are supporting Hillary. Living without a brain must be difficult."