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Joke of the Day

"I farted in an Apple Store today and got thrown out because of it Not my fault they don't have Windows"

"When my kids look back on the photos of my life they'll think, ""Wow, he wore that shirt a lot."""

"not one character on the show Friends had a job that was a joke, was broke, or had a love life that was DOA."

"I want to do to your body what Mitt Romney does to poor people."

"If you sit on your hands 15 minutes before filling in an exam, it feels like somebody else is disappointing for your teacher. Edit: grammar"

"FALLOUT 5 RELEASED TODAY No need for the VR, updates will come these next weeks provided by trump"

"Why does no one want to work in the yard with a carpenter? Because they take a fence to that."

"How can you tell which end of a worm is which ? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs !"

"bought candy at the movies and suddenly i can't pay this months rent anymore"

"I used a vaccum cleaner inside of an elevator It sucked on so many levels..."