165285

Joke of the Day

"My dog did this i was going outside for 5 minutes and I told my dog not to poop in the house. When I came back, he had pooped in the house."

"Why do abcdefghijklmopqrstuvwxy & z hate hanging out with the letter n? Because n always has to be the center of attention."

"Yo Mama is so fat She provides shelter to the people in Nepal"

"People used to go all around the world for spices. That must have been underwhelming. ""Guys, I've been gone three years and this is cumin."""

"""it looks like one horny mother fucker wrote this"" *holds up torch to read hieroglyphics painted on wall* ""it reads: ""can i fuck a pyramid"""

"What's the difference between frat guys and dogs? A dog has a better understanding of no."

"Got to admire these NFL players who are so committed to their jobs of beating the shit out of people that they do it even in their off time."

"""I love my cable company! Their customer service and pricing can't be beat! I'm glad I have no other options!"" said no one ever."

"Why do black people love fried chicken? Because it's fucking delicious, you racist"

"*Meanwhile at a restaurant* Waiter: Welcome sir, would you like a table? Me: So kind of you, I wouldn't mind. *Picks table and walks out*"