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Joke of the Day

"Bernie Sanders and his supporters. The very people who accused Trump of spreading fascism, bigotry, and racism used those very things to close down the rally in Chicago."

"The ratio of guys to girls in my friend group Is undefined!"

"Why was C afraid ? Because other alphabets were **NOT-Cs**"

"Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing. Sister : Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing. Brother : Because the people would think I am F**king you."

"Hey did you see the one about the blind guy Yeah neither did he"

"Dear Santa, Please send gift cards. Your taste has gotten significantly worse in recent years."

"[job interview] ""Tell me about yourself"" *flashback to when I used hand towels mom said are specifically for guests* I'm a risk taker"

"""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."" -Lee Harvey Oswald"

"What is the speed limit during sex? 68; once you get to 69 you have to stop and turn around."

"Hear about the Hell's Angels biker who's a baker? he's bad to the scone"