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Joke of the Day

"Project Manager Humor Why do Vampires make poor project managers? Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders. (why yes, I am a dad why do you ask?)"

"What is the frat guy's favorite ion? Bromide"

"Just remember, you're unique. Just like everyone else."

"A fish is swimming down a river when it hits its head on a big wall of stone and says ""dam."""

"WIFE: The police are at the front door ME: *hiding a bag of donuts* Do they look mad?"

"How many bears does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The bear minimum"

"An ex girlfriend of mine had a Cockatoo, that fucking thing would never shut up ... but her bird was cool."

"I just ordered a door bell on Amazon... Shit, how am I gonna know when it gets here?"

"I bet a crowded elevator smells different to a midget."

"How do you turn a fox into a cow? You marry her."