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Joke of the Day

"How do you catch a unique cat? Unique up on it"

"Bruno Mars is the best levitating vegetable magician I've ever seen. He can do 24 Carrot Magic in the Air"

"I like the phrase ""I wasn't born yesterday"" because it emphasizes the fact that babies are stupid."

"I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger and then it hit me."

"Dear every guy that works out excessively, the sun is out! NOW is your moment! It was all worth it! Take that shirt off and walk around!!"

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb really has to want to change."

"What came first the ch- Neutrino."

"I dropped my phone in the bath Now it's syncing."

"LPT: if you are lost in japan, ask for soy sauce ...it will shoyu the way"

"yeah, we r a non-traditional family. instead of naming our dog, we let him name us. I'm Woof, this is my husband Woof, & these r Woof & Woof"