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Joke of the Day

"Don't you hate it when people mirror your joke and get all the credit? p ll pu o no o ldod u no ,uop"

"Presidential Disinfectant Hydrogen Barackside"

"Me: What music you into? Date: I love hip hop Me: Yeah me too [thinking of something to say to impress her] Me: Soup Dogg is my cousin"

"*Drives by train wreck* Train wreck:""I have a boyfriend."""

"Finally Gay and Lesbian couples can get married... It's about time they were allowed to be as miserable as the rest of us."

"Two types of people that irritate me: 1. A drunk person when I'm sober. 2. A sober person when I'm drunk."

"What if all DJs decided at once to stop using the infamous air horn sound effect and started using the sound of an old man climbing stairs?"

"A horse walks into a bar... ...and the bartender says ""Heeeeyeyeyeyey, why the looooong face?"" And the horse replies ""Because the guy telling the joke that I'm starring in has bad...comic...*timing.*"""

"How do male civil unions not end with the phrase ""I dude""?"

"Doctor doctor I'm manic-depressive. Calm down. Cheer up. Clam down. Cheer up. Calm"