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Joke of the Day
"If you wait long enough, every cool thing starts to suck."
Next Joke
"Next time you're on the phone and a customer service rep asks ""Is there anything else I can do for you?"" whisper ""Smile for the camera, I'm watching you"" & hang up."
"Why is the sea so salty? Because the land didn't wave back."
"Instead of a condom i keep a moist towelette in my wallet because i run into buffalo wings alot more often than sex"
"A pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel between his legs The barkeep asks if he knows he has a wheel there.. He replies, ""Yarr, it be driving me nuts!"""
"So since Donnie Yen is in the new Star Wars Rogue Squadron movie... Will his ship be called the X-Wing Chun?"
"My handwriting has gotten pretty bad... I am the most illegible bachelor in my hometown!"
"Headline: World helium shortage over due to discovery of helium field. Scientist: (high voice) This new supply of helium is a game-changer"
"My phone battery can last longer than most relationships these days."
"I wish young people would stop idealising future dystopias and start enjoying the one they're in."