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Joke of the Day

"*sees guy having a heart attack* me: quick somebody push a cookie in his mouth! person: isn't that for diabetics? me: it's what I would want"

"I see the joke your dad told you, and raise you my dads dumb ass joke What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are a dollar fifty, deer nuts are under a buck!"

"How long do you have to wear a soul patch before your cravings for souls goes away completely?"

"Which fraternity was George Lucas in during College? Psi Phi."

"5 scientists out of 6 say that russian roulette is safe"

"Did you hear about that new species of mosquito? It's called the Nickelback, it really sucks."

"Yo mama so fat when God said ""Let there be light"" he he to ask her to move out of the way."

"My job is top secret Even i dont know what im doing"

"A conservative is beating a liberal in a debate [removed]"

"What do you call a midget fortune-teller who's on the run from the law? **A small medium at large.** ^(Hope this doesn't get posted often)"