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Joke of the Day

"I went to a car show but there were nothing but Fords I guess you could say it was a real Ford Fiesta"

"What food is bad for epileptic people? Seizure salad"

"When I'm pushing the twins in the pram and someone asks me if they're mine I say 'no, they're for my collection' and run as fast as I can"

"How do you get a Mexican across the border using only math? Carry the Juan"

"Fat girls are like mopeds. They're fun to ride until your friends find out."

"When you give up and stop believing in yourself, it's much easier to worship and idolize another. That's how ass kissing and celebrity worshiping begins."

"How do you make a Jewish omelette First off all Borrow 6 eggs."

"The teacher asked Jimmy, ""Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?"" Jimmy replied crying, ""Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"""

"Q: Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree ? A: Because it was dead."

"Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth... Then it's a soap opera."